(Sorry in advance Ms. B)
Hey again...maybe again....I'm just going to assume you've been here before. Probably after crying about your life and eating something shitty for you. It's a vicious cycle. Or is that just me? Whatever, I'm allowed to have feelings. Aaaaannnyyyway, I've just realized that I should be writing about gymnastics, so...gymnastics. Back handsprings are important. They're pretty much necessary to everything. Which sucks, because they hurt my back like ow. Uh, if you don't know what a back handspring is, kill yourself. Joking, it's totally my job to teach you this shit. You're never going to need to know any of this, but oh well. A back handspring is a back flip (again, no shit) where you sit like you're in an invisible chair, then jump backwards with an arched back, place your hands on the ground and push off, and then snap to your feet. Just like layout, you can do them with two feet, or split in the middle and step out of them. Here's a video. (Once again Blogger, you have spoiled my plans. You win this round, but I'm going to post my own videos if it's the last thing I do. I'll get you my pretty, and your imaginary that I made up just now to entertain myself dog too!)I'm not responsible for any puking or loss of consciousness due to his abso-freaking-lutely disgusting form, or for any scarring prompted by awkward mid-flip stripping. (This is really random but I'm watching tv as I'm writing this and the news is letting us know that there's an upside to herpes now? Good news guys.) Ignore that. Doesn't seem very complicated, does it? It's really not. If you have a tiny speck of talent, you'll be able to do a back handspring. Back handsprings are used on floor, beam, and vault. A vault with a back handspring is called a yurchenko. Which is pronounced UR-CHEN-KO. You can thank the damn foreigners for that crap. Freaking Russians. A yurchenko is...I'll just post the video. I don't have one of me doing it because I rarely have time to film at practice because I'm....practicing. Also I wouldn't be able to post it even if I did because Blogger has decided it wants custody of my sanity in this divorce. Whatever. The back handspring part is when you go over the vault backwards. And here's a video:
Fack you blogger, why is the thumbnail for this video so big? I'm just full of criticism today, which is *totally* unlike every other day. Rambling. Er, continuing with the gymnastics. Back handsprings are used mostly to help you gain power. Did I already say that? I don't remember. Doing a round-off into a back handspring into a flip is a lot easier than just doing a round-off into a flip. The more back handsprings you do (if you do them correctly and don't suck) the faster you will go, helping you flip higher or twist faster. An example of this is a back handspring back tuck on beam. Doing a standing back tuck is harder because you don't have any momentum, you're just...standing. Hence a standing flip. Behold this lovely video of a back
handspring into a back tuck. I promise I can do gymnastics, Blogger just wants my entire life to crash and burn. Speaking of burning, I have a burning desire to rant about Whole Foods. I'd
never been to Whole Foods before a couple weeks ago. If you've never heard of it, you should pull your head out of...well, it's a grocery store that sells all sorts of organic and expensive food for people who have a sixth sense for pesticides or whatever. Anyway, upon entering I regretted my decision to wear a leather jacket as I was immediately looked towards like the reincarnation of the devil itself. Himself. Herself? The devil. So here I was feeling judged and on the verge of being chased out of the store by an angry mob, but I persevered. Mostly because my mom wouldn't let me go sit in the car. And no, I'm not exaggerating, get that look off your face. Oh, that's just what your face looks like? That's acceptable then. The point is, we got like 6 things, including a pack of gum that was 3 freaking dollars, what?? We ended up spending around $50. Also, the check out guy didn't appreciate my compliments of his black nail polish and treated my face to some truly exceptional eyebrows of doom while I was zipping up my coat. Also I saw way more Birkenstocks (in the winter even, like there's no wrong season for hideous sandals) than I was comfortable with. And for getting through this ridiculously long and ridiculous post, here's a blooper video! See you little sunshines next time. Unless you decide I'm crazy and don't come back, that is.
Ouch, right? I've been there.....I'm still there.
(But never on a cartwheel because I don't suck that much.)
Hahaha your blog is so funny! (That came out sounding sarcastic but it's not, I swear) I love the style you write in, it sounds just like a conversation. I don't really know a lot about gymnastics, other than what I see on tv during the Olympics. But I like the way you explain things and include videos for reference. Also I have to say that I totally agree with you on the whole foods thing. Eating organic is fine and whatever, but people who shop at whole foods (or just the store itself) are the worst!
ReplyDeleteWow, those videos make gymnastics look even harder than before. I really like watching the gymnastics in the summer Olympics, so this was really interesting. I, of course, would never attempt to do a back handspring. The only thing I think I can do is a cartwheel...yayaya! The last video looks very painful...ouch >_<
ReplyDeleteI think that your blog is so funny! Your tone is really funny and I think that it is really cool that you can do gymnastics. I mean the only thing close to it I can do is dance and watch it on TV! :) x
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